what the -
I have sat in this office for the past 2 months, not doing much. I don't see much in favour for this job except the lovely paycheque I get every two weeks! That's my blessing I guess. Im at work right now, trying to look busy and stay out of the way. I do a good job lookin serious when I need to, even when my friends are telling me funny stories on msn, and I'm dying inside laughing. Yup. That's my life.
My other life, in Morden that is, has become peaceful, and pretty much there is none! But that's the peaceful part. I can't be around drugs. Or I'll do them. Or want to, and that's pretty much the same thing anyways I think. Well maybe not, but kind of. So I tell my friends here please don't smoke weed or do your meth or whatever around me, and if I have to I just go home. I've made my choice, and if I was more important than drugs to them, they would have called me more than none in the past week. Yeah I know they're calling me a tight-ass or whatever. I don't care. But I do care that they don't care, and I am not more important than a damn joint, and when they complain all the time about other people choosing crack adn coke over them, they get really mad. But they do it too. I know it's "just weed", but i also know how selfish it is, and I see now how it runs peoples lives. "I NEED to get high. that's ALL Im goign to look for ALL night. That's ALL Im goign to talk about or even think about until it happens. AND THEN Im going to go find MORE." Give me a break. I did it too. I was ridiculous. And Im not goign to do it anymore. I told them I wasn't goin to be a hypocrite anymore, and they werelike well you're not DOING it though, and I was like I dont even want to be around it.
But they dont' care. Even if they did call they'd test me to see what I'd put up with. There's no respect. Can you have a friednship with no respect? I respect their choices. Do your drugs if that's what you really NEED. I wish they wouldn't, but I understand what they're thinking. And what they tihnk they need to get by everyday. If they want to do it, I just went home. But if I come around it messes up their routine, and their freedom to get high whenever they want, so they just dont call me anymore. Oh well, only 2 weeks and 2 days left until I go back to school. And I can't wait. I'ts scary there too though!!!! Esp my internship AHHH. At least i dont have any Greek to go to THANK GOD. I'm done that forever!!! Thank GOD.
My other life, in Morden that is, has become peaceful, and pretty much there is none! But that's the peaceful part. I can't be around drugs. Or I'll do them. Or want to, and that's pretty much the same thing anyways I think. Well maybe not, but kind of. So I tell my friends here please don't smoke weed or do your meth or whatever around me, and if I have to I just go home. I've made my choice, and if I was more important than drugs to them, they would have called me more than none in the past week. Yeah I know they're calling me a tight-ass or whatever. I don't care. But I do care that they don't care, and I am not more important than a damn joint, and when they complain all the time about other people choosing crack adn coke over them, they get really mad. But they do it too. I know it's "just weed", but i also know how selfish it is, and I see now how it runs peoples lives. "I NEED to get high. that's ALL Im goign to look for ALL night. That's ALL Im goign to talk about or even think about until it happens. AND THEN Im going to go find MORE." Give me a break. I did it too. I was ridiculous. And Im not goign to do it anymore. I told them I wasn't goin to be a hypocrite anymore, and they werelike well you're not DOING it though, and I was like I dont even want to be around it.
But they dont' care. Even if they did call they'd test me to see what I'd put up with. There's no respect. Can you have a friednship with no respect? I respect their choices. Do your drugs if that's what you really NEED. I wish they wouldn't, but I understand what they're thinking. And what they tihnk they need to get by everyday. If they want to do it, I just went home. But if I come around it messes up their routine, and their freedom to get high whenever they want, so they just dont call me anymore. Oh well, only 2 weeks and 2 days left until I go back to school. And I can't wait. I'ts scary there too though!!!! Esp my internship AHHH. At least i dont have any Greek to go to THANK GOD. I'm done that forever!!! Thank GOD.
posted by mello at 09:33
1 Comments:
You have come so far my friend... to make that decision for YOURSELF and stand by it... don't look back... it can only get better right? Peace.
If you're googling today... try gapminder.org - I haven't looked through it much but it looked kinda interesting, recommended from DB's Blog.
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